One Year Later: Honoring How We’ve Changed Since COVID Started

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This year’s been hell. 

Were there blessings? Sure. 

But at the end of the day, this year’s been frustrating, gritty, gut-wrenching and tearful.

In short, it kicked the crap out of us. Essentially everyone was affected over the last 12 months by the coronavirus pandemic. 

But since you’re reading this, guess what? 

You not only made it this far, but you realize, somewhere close to your heart, that something is different about you now than when COVID-19 started.  

We worked damn hard to stay mentally and emotionally strong and get to this point. 

So what did it take? Gumption? Courage? Empathy? Vulnerability?

Yup. That and more.

So, on the anniversary of when the COVID-19 pandemic shut down the world, let’s take a moment and reflect. What mighty and awe-inspiring motions did we take to cope and carry on this year? 

Before we find out, take a moment to thank and honor your strength. 

As you read, fill your heart with compassion for all you’ve been through this year (which is a lot, my friend). 

When you’re ready, let’s begin. 💓🙏

We Problem-Solved like it Was Our Super Power

From the moment we learned COVID-19 would directly impact our life, we solved problems. It went like this: Schools closed? Find a place for my kids to learn. Grocery stores packed? Need to schedule more time to shop. Work from home? Make a new routine for myself. And so it went.

But as the pandemic continued, our problem-solving became preventative, rather than reactive. We assessed how the pandemic would affect us long term, and how we could survive it. 

For my family, it meant prioritizing our time better. Helping our kids succeed in a virtual classroom. And following health guidelines throughout it all.

We Stepped into Mother Nature’s Embrace

Once we learned we were safer outdoors, it was a green light for many of us to escape the house and see the sights at a social distance. And boy did we feel better once got outside!

Some of the benefits of being in nature include lower stress and improved mood, mental health and overall well-being. And during a time when we felt more fear, anxiety and stress than usual, that relief sounded pretty good. 

Knowing we needed the aid Mother Nature had to offer, we sought refuge at beaches, trails, national parks, and even the sidewalks in our neighborhood.

We Reclaimed (Some) of Our Time

With unusually empty schedules, many of us tried something new, dedicated more time to activities we already love, or indulged in self-care. 

Whether we played more with the kids, learned an instrument or a language, or sipped coffee over a good book, we saw potential in creating time for what we wanted to do.

And we courageously used it to pursue things that mattered to us. Because we know this time will come to an end, eventually. And sometime after that, we may even miss the quiet moments we spent doing something for ourselves.

We Embraced Our Empathy

We could identify, on some level, with one—if not all—of the grievances COVID-19 spawned. 

Children robbed of school experiences. Overloaded parents. Isolated senior citizens. Daring essential workers. The uncertain unemployed. The families and friends who lost loved ones without being at their sides or funerals. And all those who suffered social, racial and gender injustices and inequalities brought to light during the coronavirus pandemic.

We heard story after story of suffering. And we compassionately imagined what it would be like to be in another’s shoes. Their loss was not our own, but we felt it and grieved for them.

We Confessed Our Mental Health Mattered, Finally

Isolation, stress, overwhelm and grief took its toll on us early in the pandemic. In April 2020, text messages to the federal disaster distress hotline increased by 1000%. Texts from 20,000 people were reported—up from 1,790 texts in April 2019. 

Traditionally in our healthcare system, mental health conditions get pushed aside. But the pandemic changed that. WE changed that. By demanding that our mental health mattered. That we couldn’t “suck it up” anymore. 

And as a result, the requests for telehealth services boomed. More people practiced mindfulness and meditation. Our schools started mental health check-ins with students. Workplaces’ mental health awareness grew. And we recognized signs within ourselves of when we needed help.

We Leaned into Our Vulnerability

With COVID-19 robbing so much from us this year, we felt alone, unsure and exposed. Our trust was tenderly laid in the hands of institutions, elected officials and medical professionals who we didn’t personally know. 

So great was this feeling of vulnerability (or what some consider weakness) that we couldn’t keep it in anymore. We cried out for support. We courageously shared our pain and shed our tears with others. 

We pushed aside the uncomfortable feeling of seeming weak, to chase the assistance and resources we required. And when we courageously share our truth, something magical happens. 👇

We Connected—Deeply—with Others

Connection. That’s what happens when you dare to be vulnerable and open yourself up to others. You connect on a deeper, more genuine level.

Even though we were lonely throughout this pandemic, we knew we weren’t alone. When we honestly opened up to those we trusted, and confessed our pain, that vulnerability strengthened our connection.

There were so many of us grieving at the same time, we bonded over shared grief. In my house, we connected over regular video calls with family. Virtual happy hours with friends. And even meeting girlfriends at the grocery store just to shop alongside a familiar face.

We Survived Great, Unbearable Loss

Some of us knew one of the 2.6 million victims of coronavirus. Or bid farewell to a loved one during the pandemic without a proper funeral. Or mourn the loss of loved ones we can’t travel to see. Or grieve the loss of memories and milestones that should have been: births, graduations, events, etc. 

We suffered this year. And knowing we don’t get a do-over only makes it worse. 

But every day, we wake up, bravely face what’s next, and keep moving. Some days, that alone takes all the energy we can muster. And that’s OK. We did our best. And still do.

We Evolved into Something More Complex (and Beautiful)

When you fight through what we did, you exit the battlefield with some dents in the armor. There are pieces of our hearts still broken. But there are also parts that grew larger. 

We mustn’t view the broken, hurting or healing parts of us as weak. We bravely fought through this last year for our health, our family, our livelihoods and more. 

As a result, our strength and courage birthed us into a new and different, yet stunning, version of ourselves. And that process of change is still happening. Because until the pandemic is over, we can’t fully retreat from the battlefield.

We Redefined Our Hopes for the Future

Surprisingly, there’s some silver linings to this pandemic. The stay-at-home orders forced us to define what was “essential” in our society. But I found myself asking what was essential within my personal life. 

With an abundance of time to ourselves, my husband and I built quiet moments of reflection into our day. We cuddled with our kids. We explored nature. We read. We exercised. And I know others who did the same.

We fear what life will look like when our schedules grow overcrowded again. This pandemic forced us to decide what was essential in our lives. What mattered most. My hope for my family’s future is that we cling to that theme, build time into our day for what’s essential to us, even as our lives get busy.

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How Are You Stronger Now than When COVID Started?

Remember the aching feeling in your heart of pain and loss you suffered this year. 

Recall the loved ones you reached out to. Confided in. Sought help from.

Realize how connected you’ve become with your feelings. And your body’s reaction to them. 

Take a moment to honor your courage. 

Your strength. 

Your growth. 

Breathe into those feelings. And hold them close to your heart as you embark on what’s left of this pandemic. 

💗🙏☮

Friends, I’d love to hear your stories of courage. Let me know in the comments below how the last year changed you. 👇✍👇
~Chelsea